Spontaneous Song of Intense Sadness

Spontaneously Arisen Song of Intense Sadness[1]

by Jamyang Khyentse Chökyi Lodrö

May the misdeeds and suffering
Of all sentient beings, my past mothers
Who are as infinite in number as space is vast,
All fall upon me.
And may these maternal beings
Gain whatever happiness and virtue I possess.

I have taken birth countless times,
But today my birth is of great significance,
For I was born as a child of the paternal line of vidyādharas.
I encountered the teachings of the Victorious One at an early age,
Met a virtuous friend, the spiritual teacher,
And received an ocean of profound and vast Dharma instruction.
Am I not fortunate, therefore, I wonder.

Then again, I reflect, although I’ve received Dharma teachings,
I have not put even a single word of them into practice.
Instead I have spent my whole life consuming offerings,
Bristling with the sharp thorns of attachment and aversion,
And creating causes for falling into the lower realms in future lives.
Thinking of this, my plight, excites the 'heart-wind' of depression.

My actions might seem positive but I’m truly a wrongdoer.
Although I have the name of an emanation
Of the great all-knowing lord, it makes very little difference.
Although I’ve been labelled as one who serves the teachings,
I wonder if I’ve actually done more to disgrace them.
Reflecting on this more and more, I'm moved to tears.

Then again, I reflect, everything is illusory;
The essence of the illusory is emptiness;
All that is empty is interdependent;
The interdependence process is beyond expression;
And any partial understanding I might have
Of this dharmatā nature, which is inexpressible,
Comes from the kindness of my father-guru.
Even this is enough to brighten my mood.

Now, for whatever remains of this life,
Let me not succumb to harmful actions.
In your compassion, protect me, miscreant as I am.
May whatever actions I carry out be of benefit to others.
May all with whom I’m connected be reborn in the Blissful Land!

Thus, on the twenty-third day of the sixth month in the Bird year,[2] when I had fallen sick and was feeling intense sadness as result of the various ills of the present age, these words arose spontaneously.

| Translated by Adam Pearcey with the generous support of the Khyentse Foundation and Tertön Sogyal Trust, 2022.

Bibliography

Tibetan Edition

'Jam dbyangs chos kyi blo gros. 'Jam dbyangs chos kyi blo gros kyi gsung 'bum. 12 vols. Bir: Khyentse Labrang, 2012. (W1KG12986) Vol. 8: 563–565

Version: 1.1-20230608